When you’re trying to separate during the holidays, if you’ve recently separated, or if you’re on the edge of separating, the holidays can be an especially difficult time. While coping is never easy, there are some things you can do that will make getting through those emotional holidays more easily.
First, consider making sure you’re taking care of yourself. During the holidays, people who are just going about their normal business have trouble keeping up with self-care. However, for them, they can simply recoup after the holidays. Self-care for you could mean the difference between depression and dealing well enough with your problems. Self-care doesn’t necessarily mean pampering yourself and spending tons of cash, but it does mean getting enough sleep and downtime. In addition, nutrition is something you can’t skimp on either, so try to avoid the holiday junk food and fast food available.
Secondly, it’s a good idea not to try and tie up all of your time. You’re going through a tough time, and it’s not unusual to want to tie up as much time as you can to distract yourself. However, this is especially dangerous during the holidays. There is no reason to throw more than one Christmas party, or make six turkeys for different Thanksgiving gatherings. Don’t volunteer time you don’t have, and make sure you stick to a schedule that you have designed. It’s okay to say no to something and enjoy a night home alone with a glass of wine – this is part of your healing process, and you deserve it.
Lastly, the holidays are a great time to form new traditions with the family you have now. While you’re not replacing the good times you had before, you’re forming new feelings around a time that should be happy. Change isn’t always a bad thing, and embracing the change that comes with a divorce or separation can be a great way to start healing. Spend more time with family, friends, or travelling and seeing what’s out there are all great ways to make the holidays a happier time for you.
If you’re in the middle of a separation, remember that you’ll have to remain separated for six months to a year and live separate lives to finish your divorce proceedings. It may be hard at first, but remember you’re getting divorced in Bakersfield for a reason, and stick to it the best you can. Remember, all of the pain you’re feeling is temporary, and while the holidays do make that pain worse, that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t stick to your guns.
When you need assistance making good things happen for your separation, don’t be afraid to reach out to us and get a family law attorney that’s on your side.
